The Conjuring Last Rites is Hardly a Finale. It’s More Like The Passing of the Torch.

All The Conjuring Last Rites does is to lean heavily on callbacks to earlier films. While Judy Warren’s expanded role adds some novelty, the result feels more like a greatest-hits package than a true conclusion.

The Conjuring Last Rites PosterThe Conjuring Last Rites may mark the end of the franchise on the big screen, but HBO Max’s TV series to continue the story will keep the Warrens alive. Just this week, the streamer announced Nancy Won as showrunner, with Peter Cameron and Cameron Squires joining the writer’s room. While Ed and Lorraine Warren claimed to have investigated countless cases, only the most sensational ones ever made it to theatres—often as overblown, fictionalized spectacles. What’s missing are the controversies surrounding the couple’s methods and credibility, which can take the franchise to a level other films never explore.

At the heart of this latest film lies a familiar question: who—or what—is the evil that continues to pursue the Warrens? Earlier entries teased a hidden hand behind Annabelle and The Nun, but ultimately the lore hinges on one figure: Valak.

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Had Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom Felt More Like A Nautical Tale, Perhaps There’s Hope

Although Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom is treading water these days, it hasn’t sunk yet following its holiday premiere. I saw it on a weekend when there’s nothing else to go see on the big screen.

Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom Movie PosterAquaman and the Lost Kingdom is one of those movies that could’ve embraced all the action and love one has for a tale written by Jules Verne. But instead, what’s presented is half of one. Had this work not been a struggle to get finished, I’m sure some elements from all four storytellers (James Wan, David Leslie Johnson-McGoldrick, Jason Momoa and Thomas Pa’a Sibbett) could’ve been retained, and the director could’ve done wonders. But instead, what’s finally put together feels like conflicting concepts smashed together and the cohesiveness barely hangs on by a thread.

By the title alone, I wanted to see an Indiana Jones style adventure unfold. After Arthur (Jason Momoa) realises he can’t stop Black Manta (Yahya Abdul-Mateen II) alone, he’ll have to do more than find an ally. That’s because this villain found an artefact, a black trident, and in order to counter this item, this guardian of the sea needs a way to destroy it. And along the way, the backstory gets quite involved since it is as crazy as Lord of the Rings when concerning how he who welds that power will–no matter what–become corrupt.

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Moonfall and That Sinking Feeling….

Moonfall is hilarious to watch because we know the tropes Roland Emmerich loves using, and he regurgitates those ideas well.

Moonfall (2022) - IMDbMaster of Disaster Roland Emmerich certainly loves ancient alien theory, and I believe Stargate (1994) helped cement his status in this subgenre. He’s been to space and back with Moon 44,  but that wasn’t the movie which started it all. He’s better known for Independence Day and in that regard, Moonfall is familiar.

This movie is hilarious to watch because we know the tropes he loves using, and he regurgitates those ideas well. This filmmaker introduces Brian Harper (Patrick Wilson), an astronaut who gets canned because he failed in one mission. His peers don’t believe he saw a swarm of cosmic mist that caused his crewmates to die. He’s somewhat similar to Steven Hiller–Will Smith’s character.

On Earth, K.C. Houseman (John Bradley) is a conspiracy geek who uncovers the truth and is much like David (Jeff Goldblum’s character). This actor is good in the role, but I suspect casting wanted Jack Black. He’d be great at injecting some craziness to why nobody buys into what he discovered. The sky is falling! The moon is coming out of orbit and will soon cause world-wide devastation. 

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The Details on Why The Devil Made Me Do It with The Conjuring Franchise

These paranormal investigators turned detectives in this fictional take cannot find plausible pieces of evidence to exonerate Arne. They show their love is indeed strong to defy evil, but where was that for the young man? None of their discoveries really helped the case.

The Conjuring - The Devil Made Me Do It.pngBy Ed Sum
(The Vintage Tempest)

MAJOR SPOILER ALERT

The reason The Conjuring franchise continues to endure is that the producers decided “The Devil Made Me Do It” (for the money). They want to celebrate the life and times of Ed and Lorraine Warren, paranormal investigators, as one of undying love from a cinematic perspective. The devil you know is in whether James Wan wants to continue writing-producing, changing details concerning their cases around so it makes sense in the cinematic chronology and build to some crazy endgame–to which there was none in our world’s version of the Warrens.

Not everyone knows Ed passed away from natural causes. The real-life couple who love to blame hauntings on demons did more book and lecture tours in their twilight years. They’re not of that right age to go chasing after evil like they did in their prime. Ed’s health was fading. By 2006, he was hospitalized and eventually crossed over into the afterlife. Lorraine continued the family business with their son-in-law and daughter. She passed away quietly in her sleep, in 2019, and there’s no insinuating meaning with the thirteen years she couldn’t be with her beau.

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Guess Who’s Knocking? Annabelle Comes Home

The film ends up being carnival ride of terror that’s more chuckle-worthy than nightmarish. Annabelle deserves better.

Annabelle Movie PosterSpoiler Alert

The Conjuring spinoff Annabelle Comes Home has the feel of a been there, done that before vibe. It also marks Gary Dauberman, writer of the franchise, directorial debut. While he can nicely up some creepy set pieces, the notion of knowing how to scare the socks off of people needs a lesson by living at Chillingham Castle for a month.

When the doll briefly seen in the main series gets a spinoff to explain her origins and we all know it’s possessed by a demonic entity, Ed (Patrick Wilson) and Lorraine Warren (Vera Farmiga) have their work cut out for them. Sadly, that means tracking this porcelain work down and convincing the latest owners it’s best to let them have it so they can protect humanity from it. Wait a minute, isn’t that what Zak Bagans of Ghost Adventures fame want to do too?

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