When There’s A Hauntingly Beautiful “Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person,” Who Needs To Run Away?

Ariane Louis-Seize’s Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person twists two familiar genres into a hilarous film that works.

Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person Movie PosterPlease check local listings for showtimes near you.

When there’s a movie title that gets right to the point, I knew I had to check it out. And oh, my bleeding heart! What’s presented In Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person is everything I wanted to see in Netflix’ Wednesday with the sexiness and gothic taken away. In this world, there are people living quietly in the shadows of our own and they have their own community. Most of them are content to leave humanity alone; but when it comes time to feed, what happens is supernatural. Lamps flicker, and the victim they choose to consume are usually folks who won’t be missed.

But when one young lady decides that killing goes against all her principles, just how she survives depends on who supports her and doesn’t. For her parents, they are aghast! They have tried everything under the moon (since the sun kills them) to make her come around, but sadly her fangs aren’t showing.

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When Life Dishes out Lemons, What Onyx the Fortuitous And The Talisman of Souls Does Is….

It’s nothing but Scooby Doo style fun for the comedian and YouTuber making his own film, titled Onyx the Fortuitous And The Talisman of Soul!

Onyx the Fortuitous And The Talisman of SoulsScreening at the Fantasia Film Festival August 05, 2023
Please click here to purchase tickets

Real life YouTube occult celebrity Onyx the Fortuitous has a movie, and the brilliant mind behind this horror comedy is Andrew Bowser. After a successful crowdfunding campaign to get this film made, he’s ecstatic to play an evolution of what Marcus J. Trilbury should become. At the start of the film, he’s basically a nobody. In the eyes of his mean step-father, he’s insignificant. That also includes how he’s treated at a burger joint.

Technically, he’s a diamond in the rough and he wishes to do better. To see this character involved in a plot which includes the title “And The Talisman of Souls” suggests he’ll be going far should he make this item his own.

Here, what’s presented isn’t an evolution of his internet show. Instead, it’s a story that takes the character out of the world of YouTube and into a hyper reality where magik exists. And he’ll have to confronting his demons if he’s to become the fortunate one.

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All’s Not Well in The Secret Kingdom and What Peter Has To Do is….

Even though most of the talking critters hail Peter as the once and future king, it’s a role he doesn’t live up to in The Secret Kingdom.

The Secret Kingdom Movie PosterSaban Films
In Theaters, VOD and On Demand on June 9
Spoiler Alert

The tale found in The Secret Kingdom (previously titled Don’t Go Below) suggests Peter’s (Sam Everingham) family and their life are in shambles. He has anxiety and other problems, and we don’t really know why. When his parents decide it’s best to move to the old homestead, they are all escaping something. Matt Drummond‘s junior effort (his third film) looks at how he manages, and what’s needed is a magical hero’s journey to help this boy cope.

This movie borrows from a lot of past familiar works, like The Golden Compass, The Lion, Witch and Wardrobe and perhaps also Neverending Story. There’s a Spielberg vibe when considering how the focus is really about Pete’s relationship with his sister. When his sister Verity (Alyla Browne) chides him at his insecurities, he’ll have to save face somehow than to say he’ll always be weak.

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The Fist of the Condor Shows How the Road to Mastering Chilean Martial Arts is Rough!

In what The Fist of the Condor does best is to bring back a much-needed mysticism that modern martial arts films sometimes lack.

Fist of the Condor Blu-ray Sleeve and Blu-ray Case
Also available to purchase on DVD or Blu-Ray (Amazon USA)

Well GO USA
Available to Stream on Hi-Yah or Amazon Prime

Marko Zaror may well be the next action hero if The Fist of the Condor is any sign. He exudes the intensity of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and when considering he’s done some of this wrestler’s stunts during his early career in Hollywood, I can see him going far on his own. This actor also knows taekwondo, judo, aikido, and shotokan karate. His skills as a mixed martial artist are perfectly highlighted in this Chilean film, and yes, I’m begging for more! Although the home video release’s behind the scenes feature doesn’t add to what’s planned to the future, what’s spotlighted is a nice look at the effort put to make this work more of a cinematic experience than anything else.

Some of the exotic locations are very basic, but as for lighting it, it’s nice to see that the team wanted to use as much natural resouces to light many shots instead of camera equipment. Thankfully the Asian flavour is not lost because the lead trained under many mentors from various countries.

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When Evil Dead Rise Takes the Franchise to New Places, the Results are…

All I can hope for is that we have more details in Evil Dead Rise unfold in the same vein as Ghostbusters: Afterlife.

Evil Dead Rise PosterSpoiler Alert

Lee Cronin‘s Evil Dead Rise takes the Sam Raimi’s horror franchise to all new places, and there’s no rhyme or reason behind it. There’s no mention of the deadites, and some new world building has me believing they’ve existed since time immemorial! Even though plenty of character and visual aesthetics from the classic exist in this latest, they felt tacked on than worked into the tale.

A certain formula has to be followed. Characters have to be introduced, the Naturom Demonto needs to be found, and the terror gets awakened. The early movies didn’t go far in terms of what it means to unleash the demons in the psychological sense, but here, we’re treated to a deeper story:

Beth (Lily Sullivan) is pregnant, and she hopes to get some help from her sister. Ellie (Alyssa Sutherland) may well not be the right person. She’s a single mother raising three kids–Danny (Morgan Davies), Bridget (Gabrielle Echols), and Kassie (Nell Fisher). She’s not without her problems too; her husband left her, and if that’s not enough, the L.A. apartment she lives in is condemned, and she really should move.  Continue reading “When Evil Dead Rise Takes the Franchise to New Places, the Results are…”

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